Reflections by Luna

Another woman I met in a separate  group agreed to share her story in my blog series as well. She shares it much better than I could have. She suffered from multiple miscarriages as well as multiple IVF failed treatments. She also went through so much more than that during her storm. Here is her story of her losses and her rainbow after the storm. Her name is Tami and this is her story: No Heartbeat I had no reason to think I might never have another child.  My story started fifteen years ago when I was pregnant with my now 14-year-old daughter. I wasn't nervous during my first pregnancy. If anything, I was oblivious to the fact that anything could possibly go wrong. But, it all went smoothly- my daughter arrived perfectly on her due date with an uncomplicated, natural birth. My pregnancy was textbook. My relationship with my daughter's father, however, was anything but textbook. After my daughter’s birth, we decided to take a break. It ended up lasting years....

Like my previous article talking about advice for mothers/families experiencing a loss, I also compiled a list of things that women who have experienced a loss want others to learn not to say during or after their loss. These are things that don’t help us feel any better and even sometimes make us feel worse. One thing I have noticed while going through my own stillbirth as well as talking to other moms, who have experienced a loss, is people seem to think that losses farther along in pregnancy are harder than those early on. Or that if you have a loss after you already have kids that it’s okay and you should just focus on the other children.   I surveyed some women who have experienced losses and these are the things they wish people WOULD NOT say when they experienced their loss. ·         At least you weren’t that far along” , will your next baby replace the one you lost, when are you going to try again? ·      ...

The following is another story of pregnancy/infant loss by one of my clients. Every one of her children except her first (her sunshine baby) is a rainbow baby due to miscarriage but this story focuses on the loss that wasn’t supposed to happen. The one that should have lived if the proper steps had been taken by her doctors. This is her story: “My husband and I were super excited to find out that we’d be welcoming our 2nd child the following summer. But there was some complications from the beginning. I had a bad fall. So at about 8 weeks, I started to bleed a lot. Like a period. I’d see my OBGYN and he’d tell me that I had a Chorionic hematoma, and that it wasn’t much to worry about. I went on to bleed the rest of my pregnancy. Fast forward to week 17. I was standing up cooking dinner when I felt a huge GUSH of fluid. Thinking it was just urine, I go and change. But it continues to happen. Concerned, I go to the ER. They tell me that it’s just urine, and just send me home. 2 days...

Even though pregnancy comes with a lot of difficult trials, it is an amazing time in your life. It is a time of celebration and of anticipation as you prepare to meet your little bundle of joy. It’s a time where you become strong – stronger than you ever thought you could possibly be. During this time, you create your initial bond with your child that will continue throughout your entire lives. There are very few women who actually feel like they are beautiful while they are pregnant – especially during the first pregnancy. However, the miracle of pregnancy is a beautiful thing. Swollen feet, stretch marks, and hormone changes aside – you are growing a real live human being inside of you. All of those side effects come from different things your body has to do to help nourish and protect your baby. You are beautiful, and you should take the time to celebrate these changes and this amazing moment in your life. These photos will be a great gift to pass down to your child as an ...

There is a time when sorrow can hit. A time for joy, and a time for pain. It may or may not be expected. The loss of a child is a tragedy that defies all others. It might happen during pregnancy, infancy, childhood or even adulthood. No matter when it happens it leaves a hole in the heart of those left behind. Miscarriage/infant loss is something isn't talked about often because of the different feelings it may come up. The rainbow is a symbol of hope and peace. It’s also a symbol of joy. A rainbow baby is a term used to describe an infant born after the loss of another child. 1 in 4 women experience infant loss during pregnancy or even birth. Any child born after that is considered the "rainbow of hope after the storm." This child may be extra special. Not only do they have a family here but also up in heaving watching over them. Celebrating the creation of life during pregnancy is amazing but it’s even more special when that child holds special meaning and has...